- What are the symptoms of pregnancy denial?
- How do you know if you are in denial of pregnancy?
- Overcoming denial of pregnancy
What are the symptoms of pregnancy denial?
In general, a pregnancy is quite easy to spot, even if you're not particularly in "try-on-baby" mode! A late period is a first warning sign, followed by unmistakable changes: the chest is tense or even painful, nausea and fatigue of the first trimester appear, your jeans quickly become a little tight.
In the case of denial of pregnancy, none of these symptoms occur , which makes it difficult to spot . The future mother does not gain weight, does not change morphology, does not feel the baby's movements and does not experience the appearance of the pregnancy mask. There is no amenorrhea, that is to say no absence of periods . The body remains the same and daily life continues quite normally, without sowing any clues about the tremendous upheavals brewing inside.
We distinguish between partial denial of pregnancy (gestation is discovered between the second trimester of pregnancy and the term) and total denial of pregnancy : it is then discovered at the time of giving birth, when the pregnant woman comes to consult urgently to abdominal pain that turns out to be labor contractions.
Denial of pregnancy is not a pathology, it has been considered since 1985 as a psychiatric disorder, an unconscious phenomenon which finds its source in psychological mechanisms. The psyche blocks the manifestations of pregnancy to deprive it of all reality and prevent the woman from being aware of it. This phenomenon of defense and protection is triggered for reasons that are specific to each person and which can find their source in a difficult personal history, past or current traumas, such as rape or acts of violence, or even a complex relationship with body, femininity, motherhood or sexuality…
How do you know if you are in denial of pregnancy?
Denial of pregnancy can affect all women , regardless of their age, socio-professional category, lifestyle... It can affect women who already have children, such as first-time mothers!
Some small signs can alert you to the denial of pregnancy: the pregnant woman may, for example, complain of intestinal pain (which is in fact the baby's movements) or back pain (the stomach remaining flat, the uterus stretches upward and the fetus grows along the spine, which can lead to lower back pain). These signs remain very discreet and are not necessarily immediately associated with pregnancy, especially since the brain tends to attenuate the sensations : the kicks so characteristic of babies are misinterpreted and are more similar, depending on the say pregnant women, to gurgling or intestinal disturbances.
The illusion is such that those around you (your spouse, your colleagues, your friends, etc.) do not notice any changes either and doctors can also miss the diagnosis. Pregnancy can also be discovered accidentally, during another medical examination. The only way to know if you are in denial of pregnancy is to carry out a home pregnancy test or a blood test because hormone levels remain the best indicators.
Overcoming denial of pregnancy
Finding out about your pregnancy at an advanced stage is like a real psychological shock , not always easy to overcome.
On the one hand, there is the guilt of not having realized anything. Follow-up and mandatory medical examinations such as ultrasounds were not carried out on time, with all the risks that this entails for the health of the pregnant woman and that of the fetus. Not all of the memorable moments of pregnancy have been experienced and cannot be made up for, which is a real heartbreak for some women. And the mother-to-be, not being aware of her condition, has not necessarily paid attention to her lifestyle (tobacco, alcohol, unauthorized medications, etc.), or to her diet, which can add to stress regarding the health of her baby .
On the other hand, the bond with the child is more difficult to establish. Some women are in shock to learn late of the happy event, even though, perhaps, they did not particularly want to have children at that time in their lives. The fetus is then seen as an obstacle to their plans, a cumbersome weight. In some cases, fortunately rare, denial of pregnancy can lead to neonaticide or infanticide.
To help overcome the ordeal of denial of pregnancy, those around you have a very important role to play. It is essential that the future father or your loved ones support you in the preparations, the purchases of childcare equipment, which must be carried out quickly, and if the denial is total, that they help you take care of the baby upon discharge. of motherhood and getting your bearings.
If you don't have a listening ear close to you, or if you feel the need to talk to someone outside your family and friends, don't hesitate to consult a psychologist who will help you accept the situation.
In any case, rest assured: studies show that pregnancy denials generally have little impact on newborns and mothers after childbirth. The maternal instinct takes over from birth, and after the surprise, the infant naturally finds its place in the family, relegating the denial of pregnancy to the rank of bad memory for young parents!
